Oh great.

Mar. 1st, 2015 08:19 pm
helbling: (vampire)
[personal profile] helbling
Utterly hate the build your crew ooc concept for the 24hour. Don't actually have words for how much. It hits just about every we don't like you and don't want you trigger I've got. In a way that is reasonably understandable actually, when you look at it. Fantastic way to top off the feeling of being isolated and unwanted. Bloody awesome.

Should just fucking give up.

Date: 2015-03-02 04:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pujaemuss.livejournal.com
I don't know if this helps you, but it helps me to hear it when I get this way - I like you and enjoy your company a lot and want you around.


Date: 2015-03-02 08:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] helbling.livejournal.com
*hugs* Thank you.

Date: 2015-03-02 12:32 pm (UTC)
xanthipe: (Default)
From: [personal profile] xanthipe
You have my sympathy; it does very much suck to feel excluded when people are happily talking away about things that you're not part of. If I'd realised that your quietness yesterday was anything more than tiredness I would have made more effort to include you or shift the conversation around.

In all honesty, I suspect the only reason that Snipe hasn't been snapped up is because you've made noises about making her a Captain and people are waiting on that before asking. It might have been better if they'd asked for captains and set those before letting crews form, but I guess with all the push to get sign-ups et al organised now then Dave and James didn't feel like they could wait. The ships are going to be getting re-balanced on a stats basis before the 24hr and no one's going to get left behind - if nothing else team size and number of ships hasn't been set yet and won't be until they've got a better idea of who's coming.

From experience, there's no good way of sorting out 24hr teams. Letting the players do it OOC leads to this sort of feeling; letting them do it IC is significantly worse because people are getting the same feelings on the day and it gives you no time or opportunity to re-balance. Picking the teams generally gets the GMs moaned at for favouritism and not letting people hang out with their mates.

So yeah. You are liked and wanted, it's just people getting carried away again. Shoot the headweasels (or let the headferrets do it for you); it will pass once everyone settles down again. And until it passes, you know you can just poke me on Skype if I'm about.

Date: 2015-03-03 06:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] helbling.livejournal.com
Yeah - I wouldn't mind if it were something I'd made a decision not to go to and that was the reason I had nothing to contribute, but as it stands... *sigh*. I did try to verbalise to some people quietly that I wasn't happy, but I don't think I was clear enough (mainly because I couldn't give reasons, because, as ever, I am me and thus can't get to the root of an emotion without some space and a few hours in a safe location to process) about it.

Tbf, I only made noises about Snipe being captain because that was what an original idea was. I was with other people when the brief came out on Friday, and what was immediately jumped to was Snipe being captain and persons [X],[Y], etc, would all come play with her, omigosh, excitement, and so forth. Given it was a rough conversation in a dark club I was hardly taking it as a set in stone plan, but it was still more than a little jarring to go from that to turning up on Sunday morning to be told that other crews had been formed, all of which were full, oh, except the GMs might let them have more spaces, only we're not interested in having you for those either. It would have been kind of nasty to just get left out without being thought of (Doug is having this problem; he's not said a word about Gerrard being a captain, because he really doesn't think he'd do well and doesn't want to, but people seem have assumed he will be and have ignored him as a result) but to go from being included to being declared to be surplus to requirements without anyone even talking to me was...yeah, not a pleasant feeling.

I have now thrown Snipe into the ring as a Captain, though, ironically enough. I figured if I was going to get left out, I may as well get left out in a way that maybe I can make others feel included. I would hypothesize, however, that the sheer fact that I've felt the need to take that step does mean people have been left behind - I think the only thing worse than being put in a crew because no one else wanted you would be being put in a crew where you knew they actively didn't want you, but the GMs rebalancing for stats meant they had to have you. The more I think about it, the more I like the idea of the 'form pairs or trios with who you want to hang out with most, we'll form you into larger groups by bunging those together' tactic. If you have to have groups that is - I vastly prefer the going solo thing.

Date: 2015-03-02 12:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] appyamy.livejournal.com
*Hugs* It has become something of a popularity contest by the sounds of things both pre and post LARP game though I'm hoping it's just a mass of KEEN and 'What if' scenarios.

I'm currently trying to figure out a better way of doing it and suggesting it to the GMs. No one should have to go through this sort of thing for any reason. As Judith said though, there doesn't seem to be a full proof method for this sort of thing.

Lastly, I apologise if I've inadvertently added to the feeling. I had a lot of LARP KEEN over the thought of team half orc reforming again. I didn't think past that which is a horrible thought.

To me you are very much wanted and I care a lot about you. If I had my way I'd be beating your head weasels away to stop them making you think anything different.

As ever, I'm around if you need me. ^_^
Edited Date: 2015-03-02 12:53 pm (UTC)

Date: 2015-03-02 02:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] helbling.livejournal.com
Just turning team ideas around in my head -will reply to other stuff later - I have worked it out as the following:

- is there a reason we have to have 2 games on the bounce where everything is done in teams? Because it didn't work great last year.
- ideally teams should always be smaller than people want them to be, because otherwise they have no incentive to socialise with or roleplay with those outside their teams, at which point you don't have a fest event, you're just running several linears simultaneously and competitively.
- You should never allow people to start forming teams before you've given them guidelines on size, because otherwise people are going to start making lists of who they'd like on their team in order of priority, and its going to be really really shitty for those down the bottom of the list, or who don't feature on it at all. Work out your guidelines for what you want on teams, THEN publish and let people go frantic with keen. It's a lot less hurtful to hear 'sorry, we're full' than it is to hear 'we think we're full, but we're talking to the gms about maybe letting us have more people with us, but sorry, that won't be you either'.
- a good middle ground would be asking people to form pairs or trios with who they want to play with, and then the gms joining up those smaller groups to make larger ones. That way everyone has at least 1 or 2 people in their team they wanted to roleplay with, the rest is the luck of the draw, and you don't have people forming these huge cliques. And you might get a bit of imbalance, but it should only be a bit, and most people don't mind that, if they've had a good time anyway.

Date: 2015-03-02 06:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] appyamy.livejournal.com
Yeah, that all makes sense to me, I especially like the idea of forming pairs or trios since that eases my fears of ending up in a group I don't mesh well with and having to find my fun elsewhere (It hasn't happened yet but when does that stop fears?)

Date: 2015-03-03 06:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] helbling.livejournal.com
*hugs* I really appreciated that you toned down the squeeing when I said it was making me unhappy, thank you. I don't mean to crush anyone's keen.

Date: 2015-03-02 06:16 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cheekychipmunk.livejournal.com
*hugs* I know exactly what you mean, and if it does help, you are awesome and I always want you around and opportunities to spend time with you.
If you do want conversation time, please do poke me on Skype.

Date: 2015-03-03 06:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] helbling.livejournal.com
*hugs* Thank you for the reassurance, it is appreciated.

Date: 2015-03-02 07:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] greg-r.livejournal.com
I also enjoy your company and want you around. I agree that it is a poor way of doing teams. I mean I can see why but it just makes me less likely to make it to the event. I won't be able to finalise it until the last minute and don't want to grapple with head-weasels trying to get a team to take me at the last minute especially as I don't like being on a team with any of my characters due to sub-optimal statting.

Date: 2015-03-03 06:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] helbling.livejournal.com
Thank you for the reassurance. If I do get a team, I'd really like you on it - I'm bringing a campaign character, so going in to win was never ever going to be an expectation in terms of stats, and roleplaying with you is lots of fun. Good luck on the finalising stuff though :-S

Date: 2015-03-02 07:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] same-difference.livejournal.com
Added to the like you and enjoy spending time in your company, and all the understandings about the situation.

Date: 2015-03-03 06:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] helbling.livejournal.com
Thanks for taking the time to add your reassurance, it does help.

Date: 2015-03-05 10:45 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] midget-gem.livejournal.com
I also want to say that I like your company for the brief times we've met/spent time together. Hugs.
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