Mar. 5th, 2015

helbling: (vampire)
On a lighter note, I've been doing online dating for a couple of weeks now.

It has been...interesting. It has yet to yield anything like an actual date. So far, what I have learned is there is always, ALWAYS a sting in the tail. Most of the time, ridiculous ones.

Sometimes, they're upfront: I had one gentleman contact me with a line that went something like 'So what hoops do I have to jump through to take you out to dinner then?' Another who started by reassuring me that he wasn't interested in sex as he lived on another continent, and then, in the same paragraph, asked if I'd be interested in working my way, with him, through the karmasutra via cybersex.

Sometimes, they're less upfront but still obvious, like the researcher in Bristol who wrote a lovely opening message, and then topped with the revelation that he regularly wore nappies and found using them 'for their intended purpose' comforting, and if I wasn't ok with that it was probably better I didn't reply.

Sometimes, they're downright sneaky, like the guy who slipped this into one of his messages: "Awkward full-disclosure bit: I'm in a monogamous relationship that will probably become open at some point, but even without that last bit I still think making friends is lovely." So when I agreed in my response that friends would be awesome and also all that would be happening until his relationship officially stopped being monogamous, he stopped talking to me and I haven't heard from him since.

Originally I got frustrated by these things, and would delete them, but now I've taken a different approach and started documenting them. So, without further ado: screenshots from the depths of OKC!
Read more... )
That's all for now folks! Tune in next time, for more WTF moments from online dating!

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